Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Slut + Bitch = 100% slutibitchness

Sorry for ignoring my blog for long long time...
After everything, he told me I'm just his friend..wth?!..then whats with all those things he done?..so what happen to me? I been emo for the whole week. Now my face is pale like a cancer patient..
Thank god! I have a best buddy, Kenny aka Mr. So Not Awesome to comfort me ALL TIME..haha..
I'm always with him this days i m not in a relationship with him..
What he did for me?..well, hrmm kinda romantic and sweet though lols
He always send me from and to the train station like on everyday and the most sweetest thing that I hope that guy will said it to me is " becareful when you take the train "..I used to hope he will said it to me when he used to drive me to the train station but he didn't..Well, I dreamed too much about everything...
Ya i admitted I really hope everything happen can be rewind to the start, but I know time can't be stop nor rewind..I was in so much pain because of him, that's why I need to let go before I burn myself do deep..
The truth is I cant fully/100% forget about him, I felt like i was burning in hell and I'm trying to get out from it..I'm always doubting about should I just forgive him, act like he did nothing wrong to me and keep on going for me? Or I should just shut the door behind me and move on? I always wanted to be with him, so badly but he is like a fire sparks to me that will burn me like I'm in hell..
I even think of suicide before BUT it's just a thought. I didn't try to attempt any suicide acts..

To Him
If I could have a wish now, I wish I could go back to the start where all this shit didn't happen between us before. If I had insulted you, I'm really sorry but so far I can't remember insulting before maybe its because all I remember is how much you hurt me. I'm really into you and I'm not lying about what I said to you before. You really did said "..." to me but you don't remember about it at all. I know I'm a nobody to you. Sorry


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